You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
