It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
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I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
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Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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