How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
