This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize