I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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