Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Randomize
