Since when is my name a synonym for head?
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize