Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I want to fling myself into the sun
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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