I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
accomplished twins. life is a go
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize