drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Randomize