very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
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