Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
She announced her abortion via fbk
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
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he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
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