is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
