Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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