did you get engaged???
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Randomize
