he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Randomize
