the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
