Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
