Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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