no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
