have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
