My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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