she looked like the bat from fern gully.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
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