i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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