is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
