every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
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Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
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He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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