She said her name was "party"
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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