I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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