It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
