He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Randomize
