i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize