Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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