So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize