Cold hands, warm shart.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
