Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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