I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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