I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
