If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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