She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Found your dick twin last night
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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