I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
