Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
