its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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