i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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