How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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