google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
This baby is an asshole
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
