Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.