After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
