The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize