I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize