Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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