Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Randomize
